Tuesday, February 07, 2006

The Ultimate Goal

For an event coming up in a few months I've been asked to prepare a goal in each of three specific areas of my life- my health, my relationships and my career. I've been kicking it around and can't really come up with anything substantial. One of the people coordinating the event suggested a 50% solution: a 50% increase in energy, quality of relationship and income.

A 50% increase in energy would definitely put me in the hyperactivity stage. Most people will never have a relationship as good as mine is now- a 50% increase in passion would kill a healthy man. There isn't enough room for a 50% increase in sincerity. Money's nice, but I've never used it as a way to keep score. It's much more important to me to do something that matters.

It has been bothering me a bit that I don't see huge room for improvement (alright, I could work on my wind). Not that I'm "too happy", but that the things most people think of that they use to measure happiness and success don't resonate with me at all.

Still, determined to set some goals, I do what I always do when I'm stuck- I back engineer. I think about the goals and then work out the steps from the goals to where I am now. Since these questions are about improving life, the question is : What would be my perfect life?

I'd live in a cave or a small cabin, miles away from the nearest human being. A cave if it was in the desert or on a beach, the cabin if in the mountains. There would be many books and scattered souvenirs and trophys from adventures. Day to day life would be hard work- chopping wood, carrying water, hunting and skinning game.

There would be a great and wise king with a sense of justice that I trusted absolutely. From time to time he would send me a message that his kingdom or part of it or a person was in grave danger and he would trust me absolutely to fix it. I would fix it, whether it took diplomacy or stealth or combat or something else... making friends, learning and gathering more souvenirs with each mission. I would never show up at the King's court, I would never be paid or recognized, I would just be left alone. But sometimes, if the King just needed to talk, he would be welcome to visit and sit by the fire and look at the stars and drink good scotch and forget he was a king for awhile.

Analysis? I want important work; to keep my mind and body active; to test myself and take risks; and to be left alone. To serve someone whom I consider good. That's my idea of paradise.

I've come about as close to that as is possible. My agency makes good decisions and we are definitely the good guys. I'm the tactical team leader and I prevent stuff or talk them down or take them down and it's mostly left up to me which and how.

The family doesn't quite fit into the fantasy, but they're pretty cool so I'll keep 'em for now.

1 comment:

Kami said...

Thank you for keeping us in your life. And I don't even mean that sarcastically.

Love, Kami