The Doc doesn't care for my life style. Why didn't I make an appointment right after the injury? Because I was out of the country. Shouldn't be walking (or able to). Sorry, got stuff to do. We need to schedule a surgery.... Booked through October. How's October?
Have to rethink things. The knee is unstable. Reflexive, casual, regular walking it has collapsed in three different directions. So I have to pay attention all the time. The walking my dad taught me for stalking deer seems to protect it best, but it is slow. The chaos of play (much less fighting) is risky. I'm actually sitting on the edge of a career-ending injury. Yeah, definitely have to rethink.
Be an adult. Demonstrate less. Play less (and my stomach knots up at that thought.) I never really wanted to teach. I don't get an ego-boo out of people calling me 'sensei' it actually makes me feel awkward and shy. I'm Rory. Standing in front of a class changes nothing. Still just Rory. Sometimes the responsibility of teaching feels like a weight. Especially when the students invest too much in the (IMO completely wrong-headed) student/teacher relationship. My first formal class was simply because I had run out of people locally who could play the game the way I wanted to. I knew if I wanted partners that could hang, I'd have to create them. I only ever taught because I wanted to play better.
Be an adult. Limit risks. Limit chaos. Try to teach chaos while avoiding it. Which is okay, because avoiding is the best strategy for chaos. But reveling in it is the second best. Focus the classes on the lectures and data dump. And that's okay, too. I know it's the important part. Most people who train have fine physical skills. The physical stuff is easy. Will is hard. Foresight takes some practice...
So the next few months a big bulky brace and a shiny new cane. Hmmmmm. Never really got into training with a cane. Opportunity.
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