Tuesday, June 26, 2007

Scenario: Slip 'n' Slide

From a recent report I reviewed:

5' 11" tall. 250 Pounds. Serious psychological issues and still under the influence of meth. Violent and has promised to kill anyone he can touch. Naked. Currently locked in a cell, where he has flooded his toilet, urinated and defecated on the floor many, many times. The walls are smeared with his shit. The first responding deputy estimates that the cell is at least a half inch deep in raw sewage (or at least its fresh and home-made equivalent).

The threat is playing in the waste, making his own game of Slip 'n' Slide- launching himself at the floor where he slides to the opposite side of the small cell and kicks off the wall to slide back. Shit is a lubricant. He is having fun. But he would still like to kill an officer.

Your mission, young Jedi, is to get him out of the cell, without hurting him or getting hurt yourself, so that the room can be cleaned with bleach. Lots and lots of bleach.

How would you approach the problem, sensei?

You really think we get paid enough for this?


aaron said...

Can you get a fire hose in there? ;-)

The Moody Minstrel said...

After hearing about cases like this, why is it that people can still argue against euthanasia?

Drew said...

I was about to say!!!! Is a really, really cold fire hose an option? I don't know what the floor is like at your work. If you don't have a drain system you could set up sandbags to prevent a giant biomess. Do you have to get him out right away, or can you give him time for the meth to wear off? From what I've seen, the down from meth is pretty dramatic. That might be different for a psych... You'd know better than I! After he is restrained, I'd have the nurse get an order for Ativan or Haldol because he's clearly a threat to himself.

Did I do good Rory???????

Rory said...

Ah, Drew. I don't think we've been allowed to use firehoses on inmates since the eighties. You did good, especially in the use of discretionary time... but you forgot we have Tasers now. Makes it all much safer, for the bad guy as well as for us.

Drew said...

What do your protocols say about chemical restraint? Once the shitty mess is all over with, can the nurse get an order for a psych consult and haldol to hopefully keep it from happening again?